So I drive a 1990 Jeep Cherokee. I like it and I want to do some of the things I see others do to trick them out. I look at other Cherokees with big tires, lift kits and racks on the top with envy. I want to do that! I also noticed that the guys driving these things have a few things in common. Below are some of my observation and probably reasons I will never get to do those modifications to my jeep.

1. You have to have a five o’clock shadow beard. I can barely grow a mustache that looks like a stereotype Chinese 100-year-old man. These guys, even if they don’t have hair on top of their heads always look like a lumberjack. I guess I am just not that cool.

2. Moab stickers on the rear window. I could go online and buy a Moab, Utah  sticker but I know what would happen. Someone would try to talk to me like I have been there and I would have to fake it and it would just end badly.

3. The look of pity toward non-Jeep drivers. I can still look upon other cars and drivers with a sense of equality, but once you modify your jeep you have to look at everyone else with a look that says “poor other folks”. You have a jeep, it can go anywhere, your puny car or even standard jeep is beneath my status.

While I enjoy the occasional feeling of smugness it is usually aimed at people who can’t figure out how to turn on their computers, not at my fellow commuters.